From Mom’s album: “Stopped in Albuq. 7-1959” There’s more to this story in my new book!
I grew up in a family of six, with my parents, three younger brothers, and few relatives. Certainly none who lived nearby.
My parents did not share family stories or photos. Not really. We enjoyed slide shows of our own family vacations, but nothing historical. I guess they were too busy working and raising us up.
I would love to know who took this photo of the luminarias at Mt. Calvary, the cemetery next door to Sunset Memorial.
(This story originally appeared in a Facebook Note on December 24, 2012.)
Luminarias are a New Mexican Christmas Eve tradition with religious origins. (Scroll down to learn more.)
They are also one of my favorite family holiday traditions.
But… in the cemetery? Let me explain.
(Originally published Jan. 2016. Updated Oct. 2021.)
I recently (in Jan. 2016) spoke at a business networking luncheon attended by 80 women. My topic was “Who Will Check My Email When I Die?”
I worried that no one would want to come hear me talking about death, especially when it started snowing that morning. But they did! And they loved it. I could tell because they nodded, and laughed, and told me later that they had started conversations with their loved ones about virtual wills and such as a result. Mission accomplished!
Here are some of the ways people reacted to my topic before-hand: (more…)
UPDATE #1: Mystery solved! (scroll down)Who is this saucy young woman? Don’t know? Don’t care?
She looks like fun, though, doesn’t she?
What if you found this photo in a bin at Goodwill? For sale on eBay?
Would you buy it? Would you feel vaguely sad that somebody got rid of it, and move on?
What if you found her in your parents’ stuff and didn’t know who she was?
Would you keep, or toss? Would you try to find the story behind the photo?
Mom’s crystal punch bowl, usually used for fruit, is being used here for pecans.
Have you inherited keepsakes you don’t know what to do with?
I can’t tell you how many of my clients have had a garage or storage unit full of stuff they inherited from a loved one. These items represent a mix of emotions – memories good and bad; guilt over secretly wanting to reclaim the space they occupy; fear that they will accidentally discard a priceless heirloom. They are paralyzed with indecision: Am I betraying my loved one if I part with this item? Will I forget them if I don’t keep all their stuff? (I promise you won’t!) How, and where, can I get rid of it? How, and where, can I keep it?
The “farmhouse” after being painted white, pillars added, and lower windows remodeled into new front doors.
READERS: This is the sort of story I intend to write more of over the next few years to share with my family. It’s also the sort of story I encourage you to write about your own family! It doesn’t have to be fancy, with links to articles and such. Just capture the memories for future generations.
I’ve been talking and writing for a while now about organizing for your legacy. This involves doing things to make it easier on your grieving loved ones when the time comes, by preparing for your own death. Activities can range from writing your own obituary and planning your own funeral; to preserving your memorabilia and organizing your family history; to creating a virtual will and downsizing and decluttering now so they don’t have to later.
So, when I announced to my dad and brother, at a recent breakfast together, “Let’s talk about funerals!” they didn’t even flinch, replying in unison: “Whose? Yours?”
If you got hit by a bus tomorrow, what would your loved ones be left with? Happy memories, or sad ones? Clutter and uncertainty? Or clear instructions and valued keepsakes?
What will your legacy be?
Me and Mike enjoying a picnic of lemonade and raisins in 1964 Indiana.
My grandpa, dad, and brother.
Have you ever lost part of your family history and found it again? Do you still have unsolved mysteries that intrigue you?
In Puzzling Out Your Family History I talked about the joys and challenges of doing one’s own genealogy research. In The Gift of an Organized Family Tree I describe one of the several types of projects I can do for you. My Family History Research Services web page includes Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ), the first of which is, “What the heck does genealogy have to do with organizing?” In Gifts I Got from Mom, I shared more of my story. And in the Mom’s Boxes series, I share more of hers.
And here’s how it all began…..
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