Sometimes I notice a meaningful, but unintentional, theme among the books I read.
Here are some recent good reads:
Have you heard of Swedish Death Cleaning?
It’s the latest organizing buzz phrase, based on the book The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter, by Margareta Magnusson. The book is about decluttering your home and life now, so your loved ones won’t have to do it for you after you die. Which is precisely what I’ve been talking and writing about for the past few years, just not in so many words!
I don’t tend to use euphemisms for death – passed away, departed, etc. — but I did stop short of adding ‘death’ to my business name, which was ‘Organized for Life’. Instead of ‘Organized for Life and Death’, I went with ‘Organized for Life…and beyond’. I thought that ‘death’ might be off-putting to potential clients, but it’s apparently not a problem with the Swedes! The book is short, and more lighthearted than you’d expect. Charming, even. It goes a long way towards normalizing the concept of talking about death and preparing for it well in advance.
Are you planning to leave everything to your loved ones?
They certainly did In They Left Us Everything: A Memoir, by Canadian author Plum Johnson. My Canadian website consultant extraordinaire, Janet Barclay, recommended this book to me. It was good – funny and touching — and I recommend it, especially to my professional organizing colleagues. The author recounts her experience of dealing with her parent’s entire household of possessions after they died. The task turned out to be much harder and more rewarding than she ever imagined.
The author’s message, in the end, was about how much better she got to know her parents throughout the process of dealing with their stuff. And I can see how that might be true in some cases. If this is what happens in your family — because they left you everything and you really had no choice — great. However, I disagree that it’s a good plan. Take my Mom’s Boxes, for example. I was lucky that my aunt (who lived with my mom at the time in another state) took care of most of my mom’s furniture, books, clothes, and such. But I was still left with 33 boxes of paper: scrapbooks, photo albums, journals, letters, etc.
Are they trash or treasure? I’m still sorting it all out. Am I getting to know her better in the process? Not really. There are a few genealogical gold nuggets and puzzle pieces in there, to be sure, but I guess I was fortunate to already knew my mom pretty well.
Are you a senior, or helping a senior downsize?
If so, then you should read Don’t Toss My Memories in the Trash: A Step-by-Step Guide to Helping Seniors Downsize, Organize, and Move, by Vickie Dellaquila. This book will guide you through every step of the process, including deciding to move, sorting and organizing belongings, creating a plan for moving, and getting settled in a new home.
Forced downsizing is kind of like forced death cleaning. You literally cannot fit a whole lifetime’s worth of stuff from a large house into a tiny apartment. Seniors can end up feel resentful, and helpers, related or not, can feel frustrated in the process. It’s not just about the stuff, it’s about the memories and emotions associated with the situation and the stuff. The advice in this book can help ensure a smooth transition.
Do you want to live with less?
But you don’t have to be a senior to downsize. And you don’t have to be anywhere near death to start death cleaning. Why not start now? Think of it like writing a will. What do you want to happen to your stuff? Will your loved ones be able to tell which things were important to you, and which things are meaningless? Have you made your wishes known to others? What if you aren’t old or sick at all, but you get hit by a bus tomorrow? Or, maybe you just want a life that is simpler and clutter-free?
There have been many great organizing books written by my esteemed colleagues over the years. But my current recent favorite is Kathy Vines’ Clever Girl’s Guide to Living with Less: Break Free from Your Stuff, Even When Your Head and Heart Get in the Way. The author examines all the psychological reasons why letting go of stuff is so hard, and applies that knowledge to five tough categories of stuff. From the last page: “…it’s never about the stuff, and when you understand that, you’ll finally break free from it.”
Of course, if you get tired of reading, and you’d like some hands-on de-cluttering and decision-making help, or virtual guidance, don’t hesitate to call me, or a friend, or find a professional organizer near you at www.napo.net!
Have you read any of these books?
Are you downsizing, or helping a loved one to downsize?
Have you started death cleaning?
Please share with us in the comments below!
Copyright 2018 by Hazel Thornton, Organized For Life.
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